“I Am Just Here So I Don’t Get Fined”
7 ways to avoid the doghouse before the Courthouse or Chapel
So you’ve proposed, Now what? Often times, we hear men, especially the groom say, “I am just here so I don’t get fined.” What exactly does that mean? Men understand that the wedding day is about their bride, but of course, the wedding cannot continue if the groom doesn’t show up. In this post, here are a few things that you as the groom can do to keep all issues to either minimal or none leading up to your wedding day.
1: Work out all preliminary details.
Most things that will need a discussion with your bride will be the budget, any wedding arrangements, members of your wedding party and your guest list. Your say is as equally as important, so don’t miss out any opportunity to have your input in the wedding plans. Be engaged in the process as much as you can!
2: Documentation is Key!
According to your state, do check out all the requirements that are needed to file the marriage license. For example, the state of GA requires that either you or spouse has to be a resident of the state. You can apply for a license in any county, regardless of where the wedding is going to be held. You would need to apply, sign, and pay an application fee. The amount will vary depending on the county. To reduce the fees, you can take a premarital education program that consists of a 6 hour class.
https://statelaws.findlaw.com/georgia-law/georgia-marriage-license-requirements.html
3: Launch your wedding website.
This is a fun way to interact with your guests. Any information that you would need to get out should be housed there. Many questions that you all may get would be, “are children allowed, when do we need to RSVP by, due to COVID “are masks required or proof of vaccination, etc. To limit being bombarded with a lot of questions, you can house all your information there.
4: Prepare for visits with vendors.
Depending on how far out in advance your wedding is, you will have to endure COUNTLESS of visits with wedding vendors. COVID has changed the trajectory of those vendor visits, so some can be done virtually. Be prepared to have a say, especially if you are the budget! You and your bride need to be on the same page as far as what the expectation is for the vendor in which you are meeting with to provide a united front. Come prepared with some questions if their process is unclear.
5: Plan your honeymoon.
There is nothing better than a vacation, especially a BAE-cation! If you are planning to go out of the country for your honeymoon, start looking up ticket prices, hotel stay, and any excursions that you would like to take your bride on while you are there. A great trip takes great planning. In that process, make sure that all passports are renewed, and that all travel documents that are required have been taken care. Some countries may require you to have proof of vaccination or quarantine for a little time before enjoying your time there, so make sure that all research and bases are covered!
6: Purchase any gifts!
Some couples like to do a gift exchange prior to the start of the ceremony. If you and your bride are looking to do so, have that gift purchased ahead of time. Also, most importantly, you want to purchase her wedding bands! Do not wait until the last minute to purchase that especially if you are putting a lot of thought and effort into it. In addition, don’t forget to purchase gifts for your groomsmen, hosts/hostesses, and most importantly your parents. If you are considering customizable gifts, be mindful of shipping to make sure that those gifts arrive on time!
7: Make all required deposits and sign contracts.
All of the vendors who plan to service your wedding should have a deposit required and a contract outlining services. Be sure to read the fine print and ask any questions about any policies or procedures. Your deposit locks in your date and your vendor. Be sure to have that paid so that there is no confusion on either end as far as who or what is covering your day. The sooner you pay your deposits, the less stress and energy you can spend into planning other important things for your wedding.
Bonus Tip: Periodically check in on your bride!
Always, always, ALWAYS do a temperature check. A little goes a long way. She may be feeling overwhelmed and may not say. Touch base with her and offer any help where and if you can. She will appreciate it in the long run.